A CHRISTMAS TALE...DRESS REHEARSAL
Christmas is coming
Everyone’s getting stressed,
The Infant Christmas Production
Is putting us to the test.
We’re on the way to Bethlehem,
The children are finally dressed,
The costumes have seen betters
days –
It’s a pity they weren’t pressed!
Joseph is teasing the donkey
Who is terribly, terribly slow
And has now stopped altogether
Because he doesn’t want to go.
We’ve got too many angels,
The stars are thick on the ground,
Yet when we ask them all to sing
It’s hard to hear a sound.
The Kings forgot the presents,
The camels haven’t appeared,
Mary is looking tearful
Just as we all had feared.
Instead of ‘Sorry, there is no
room’
The innkeeper opens the door,
He tells them they can go inside
And sit down on the floor.
The villagers are fighting,
The shepherds kick the sheep,
Some of the narrators
Are sounding half asleep.
The doll was in the manger
Now Mary takes it out,
She’s gone from tearful to
excited
And she’s waving it about.
Then comes the Grand Finale,
There’s a puddle on the floor,
It’s time to call a finish
Or there’ll be a whole lot more.
So things are just as always
Becoming extremely fraught –
But the parents will think it’s
brilliant,
That’s such a comforting thought!
The Panto was a success, that
we do now know,
All those girls and boys – they
really did all glow.
Merry Christmas to all the
children, as they all do play,
But don’t forget to go to bed
early – as Santa arrives on his
sleigh!
A drunken Santa has made it
through,
And beat the traffic queue!
He now flies home to Lapland,
With a sherry in his hand!
He shouts; “Merry Christmas,
folks, and gives a cheeky wink”,
He flies away, oh so fast – he
daren’t even blink!
by
DARRYL ASHTON
A CHRISTMAS TO REMEMBER
We’re getting near to Christmas,
There’s lots of things to do.
There’s cards to write and gifts
to pack
To friends both old and new.
We’ll think about the good old
days
When Father Christmas came
And left a shiny penny,
And a tangerine and a game.
We’d have a lovely dinner,
Turkey, Yorkshire, spuds and
sprouts,
And a home-made Christmas
pudding,
With mince pies, without a
doubt.
And nuts and dates, oh, what
a treat,
And paper chains were hung,
Then someone played piano,
And carols would be sung.
Let’s think about the Christ
child
As he in the manger lay,
And remember that without
him
There would be no Christmas
Day.
by
DARRYL ASHTON
Nice and tidy.
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